Thursday, October 24, 2013

Miles Apart with No Distance

Wow, coming home from the airport that late Tuesday afternoon almost 3 months ago felt great!  I've been so blessed to be able to experience the world, but the feeling of touching ground on my turf, breathing in this atmosphere that I call home, and seeing my beautiful family whom I haven't see in 3 months is definitely an irreplaceable feeling.  That feeling NEVER gets old.

I think one of the hardest things for me is being separated from my family.  I always know I'll see them again, and with technology these days, video chatting is also an option, but it's nowhere near the same.  First, there are my parents.  It's different being separated from them, no doubt I miss them so so much when we're not together, but I know that they let me go because they trust and support me.  They allow me to spread my wings and experience the world, while still always having a nest to come home to.  Then there are three of us siblings, we're all very close, and with the environment that we grew up in and the way our parents raised us, we grew up becoming not only siblings,  but best friends.

My sister moved out to Minnesota for a school internship which then turned into a job offer...aaaand about 8 years later I'm still waiting for her to move back!  The night before she left I remember getting upset and going to my room crying.  I was upset that she had gone to each one of my family members to talk and have the "see ya later" conversation,  everyone except me.   Then as she curled up with me, crying together, I found out that she was prolonging MY "goodbye" because it was going to be the hardest one.  This day I thought would change our family dynamics, one of us is actually leaving the nest.

Then there's my brother, my baby brother...who sometimes actually feels like my older brother.  A couple years ago I was offered a promotion, but it was out of state.  You would think that being single (at the time), getting promoted, being able to go live on my own, expenses paid, that I'd have my bags packed and waiting for me by the door, but this wasn't the case.  So many reasons weighed in my mind why I should stay, and having to leave my brother behind was definitely probably the hardest to wrap my mind around.

And now coming home after 3 months, I definitely got that "finally home" feeling, but still so bittersweet because now I'm home, but I left a piece of my heart back in Italy.  This time I was leaving my husband behind and won't see him physically for 3 months, this was something I was not looking forward all! We've done the long distance thing for a lot of our relationship,  but it was different this time.  We've lived together as husband and wife, went on many adventures, had our daily routines and got to know each other more on a different level, it was so awesome and perfect!  He's the best husband I could have ever been blessed with, how could I ever imagine not being by his side??  Fortunately,  we are able to talk and video chat every day, which in our situation I'll happily take!

Besides those who are closest to my heart, there are still of course my friends and other family who I get separated from.  Through the years of being away from my love ones, whether it's me leaving or them, I've gotten more acclimated to the fact that my family and I are not always going to be together.  It's never going to get easier being away or having to say "see you later," but you get through those moments together.  If your relationship means that much to you, you can be thousands of miles apart with no distance between you at all.  You can disagree with each other's decisions while still being supportive of each other.  You can love someone so much, that being separated is a sacrifice, but it's a sacrifice that you make together.  If you're "leaving" to follow your heart or to chase a dream, make every moment count and live each experience to it's won't regret the your decision.  I know for me, all those times I've left and moved back's always been such a great experience that I wouldn't trade for the world.

My husband will be here in just a few more days and my sister will be arriving with her husband in just a few weeks...amazing feelings of anticipation are starting to swell in my throat.  And it's the same feeling I get coming back home to see my parents and my brother.  And if life pulls us apart geographically, this is a feeling I'll accept because I know it comes from love. There is definitely nothing better than being together again with the people you love.

Keep your relationships strong, and make them count.  Even if it's with only a few people or even just one, have that person to confide in and keep you grounded; or be that person for somebody else.  And those times you are apart, it can actually feel good knowing you have someone that is supporting you and waiting for you to come back.

Rubi Anne Dijamco Agostini

No comments:

Post a Comment