It is a lie to believe that there are not enough hours in the day. The truth is, we have just the same amount of time as everyone else. If we’re doing what is purposed for us in a wise, timely manner, we will have enough time, however, we are not purposed to take on the tasks of others, like we women so often do.
We are also overtaxing ourselves when we take on too many projects at a time, feeling like we can do it all and then feeling guilty when we are unable to complete the tasks. I do believe we can do it all, just not all at once.
It’s also important to remember that priorities and tasks change as we mature, and life changes. For example, my laundry duties changed when I decided my boys were old enough to do their own laundry. Now, I don’t do laundry but once every couple of weeks, because I’m only doing my own.
Another thing I often hear women say (and I’ve been guilty of saying it myself), “I spend so much time doing things for ________ (husband, kids, family, church….) I don’t have time for myself!” Often, the woman saying this appears run-down, frumpy, grouchy and she often finds herself physically unwell.
When this was happening to me, a few important women in my life had to keep reminding me that if I didn’t take care of myself, I wasn’t properly taking care of my family; if I didn’t take time out for myself, I would be no good to anyone else. It’s a lie to think that we have to continually put our needs last in order to be a good wife/mother/ woman. We can’t and don’t respect others when we forget to respect ourselves. Furthermore, how can we expect others to respect us, when we don’t?
I am so grateful for the women in my life who frequently step in and kindly put me in my place. In tribute to them, I am paying it forward and passing on their wisdom.
Some of those women I will be seeing tonight at a small group discussing this exact topic. If you are in the Walnut, CA area and would like to join us, email me at firstname.lastname@example.org and I will happily give you the details.
-Tessa L. Charles
-Tessa L. Charles