Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Love Actually

I was talking with a friend yesterday and we proposed an interesting question to each other, and now, in light of Valentine’s Day, I propose it to you, I am very interested in what you have to say.  So here’s the question: In some cases, is it easier to love someone than like them?   At first it seemed preposterous, but the more we discussed it, the more it seemed plausible to us.

Using myself as an example, when I was younger, although I loved, protected and cared for my younger brother, there were many times when I just couldn’t stand him! I even asked my mom once if I could divorce him!!   I love my sons, I would die for them without a second thought, but if I’m honest, when they were babies, there were those early mornings, after days and days of “early mornings”, I just felt like throwing them out the window!  I love my husband fiercely, but some days………well, you get the idea!

We came to the conclusion that it is okay not to like everybody, even the people we love.  What’s important is that we continue to love them, honor them, and respect them despite their idiosyncrasies.   We remember, we love them, honor them, and respect not because of who they are, but because of who we are.  We don’t take their mistakes personally; in fact, whenever we perceive that they are making personal attacks or when they’re careless with their remarks, we give them the benefit of the doubt and think otherwise.

 I’m not saying we let others steamroll over us and take advantage of us, in fact, it is actually a loving act to respectfully confront those who are treating us (and/or others) dishonorably.  And if they continue to mistreat, it’s fine to love them……from afar!  I truly believe there is a way we can love, even the most unlovable.  I’ve seen it.  I’m not perfect and I am admittedly, in the “practice” stages.  

I’m sure all of us would love to hear your input and your personal experiences, I know you have them.  I have been made aware that some of you have tried to leave comments and have been unable to.  I learned yesterday, that you may have to have a Google account to leave a comment and I’m really sorry about that.  Had I known I might have chosen a different blogger site.  However, you can email me at: and I will post your comment and then respond.  

Thanks and have a great Valentine’s Day!

-Tessa L. Charles


  1. Agreed. Agreed....and....agreed! This happens all of the time, even to people that don't understand the love of God. We are constantly faced with the decision to love people, even though we don't like them. That is the amazing love of God going before, behind, and (thankfully) with us.

  2. Thank you for your input, Nicelle. Loving people is totally a decision! Lots of times I hear people say, "You don't choose who you fall in love with" and that's simply not true and it works conversely as well, we can choose to love those who have been deemed, "unlovable". But it's SO not easy on our own volition or effort.